Friday, February 17, 2006

TGIF (now known as The Sports Page)

This is somthing that goes back to my student days in Detroit. We used to call it happy hour and we would change our venue from week to week but ultimately would end up at The Ramp Room ( so named because is was on the ramp to the Lodge freeway). Many happy hours spent there and other places (remember that the drinking age used to be 18. When I was 21 it changed to 21 so I never drank illegaly( I don't think my kids can say the same!)

Anyway, where I work now, I go out to the bar on Fridays with some of the teachers that work with me. Not so many go because of other committments(sp?) but I wait every week for one of the teachers to send the invite out(in case others would like to come....we like to invite all!!)

Now the guy that sends the invite is a very talented, creative person and everyone waits to see what the invitation will be on Friday. I am including 2 of my favorites.

To: EveryOne> Subject: a view into my mind>>

A LITTLE INTERNAL MONOLOGUE (believe it or not as an example of my thought patterns this isn't too far off ). Hmm, what to write about this week, I already did the wheel of fortune thing, already did my surreal joke...... wow I'm choking here I can't think of anything remotely clever or interesting to write.....maybe a dirty limerick, nah I should keep it rated "G".... I can't remember the last "G" movie I saw, it had to be a cartoon.... I like cartoons.... I remember old Tom and Jerry cartoons, what was the name of that depressed dog on that show, Drippy? No Droopy that's it. I wonder if they have Tom and Jerry DVDs on Ebay, maybe I should check that out, I would be willing to pay at least $13 for one....Why is 13 an unlucky number, why not seven? Is it because it's prime, no because so is seven.. Seven was a great movie, one of Pitts last good movies, why is America so obsessed at who he's dating, I think it's ridiculous the amount of attention that celebrities get for dating other celebrities, J Lo and Ben who really cares, neither of them can act Ben peaked in the movie Chasing Amy.... hey--I just wasted half a page and I have no Idea what to type for the Sports Page, oh well I'm not even going this Friday, so this will have to suffice.....Have a great weekend!! MG

Next one coming up

To: EveryOne> Subject: I love Thesaurus. COM>>

Come out today to the

SPORTS: adventure, amusement, athletics, bingo, business, distraction, diversion, enterprise, festivity, follow-the-leader, frolic, fun, jest, joke, lark, line, merriment, merrymaking, nothing game, occupation, pastime, piddly, plan, play, proceeding, pursuit, recreation, romp, scheme, sport, sports, undertaking

PAGE: folio, leaf, recto, side, signature, surface, verso

BAR: alehouse, bar, barrel house, barroom, beer joint, beer parlour, bucket shop, dive, drinkery, gin mill, grog shop, honky-tonk, hospice, hostelry, hotel, inn, joint, lodge, lounge, night spot, nineteenth hole, pub, public house, roadhouse, rum room, saloon, speakeasy, suds shop, taphouse, taproom, watering hole

and have a

ALCOHOL: booze, canned heat, cocktail, drink, ethanol, firewater, hard stuff, hootch, intoxicant, liquor, methanol, moonshine, oil, palliative, red-eye, rotgut, sauce, smoke, spirits, tipple, toddy

DRINK: absorb, belt, booze, consume, dissipate, down, drain, gargle, gulp, guzzle, imbibe, indulge, inhale, irrigate, lap, liquor up, nip, partake of, put away, quaff, sip, slake, slosh, slurp, soak up, sop, sponge, suck, sup, swallow, swig, swill, tank up, thirst, tipple, toast, toss off, wash down, wet whistle


TALK: articulate, babble, blab, broach, chant, chat, chatter, chaw, chin, comment on, communicate, confess, converse, describe, divulge, drawl, drone, express, gab, gabble, gossip, influence, inform, intone, notify, palaver, parley, patter, persuade, prate, prattle, pronounce, rap, reveal, rhapsodize, run on, say, sing, soliloquize, speak, spout off, squeak, squeal, tell, tell all, use, utter, ventriloquize, verbalize, voice, yak

with your

CO-WORKERS: accessory, accomplice, associate, coadjutor, collaborator, colleague, confederate, friend, friendly, helper, partner

I go to the bar just to see this guy in action....he is a hoot and I am the only over 50 person there every week.....Everyone else is under 30..It is nice to know who your friends are..

but if my sister lived near...I know we'd share a few ourselves.

Have a great weekend....whether you go out for a drink or not!

Thursday, February 16, 2006

RE: civic duty

In case anyone is following the news here....
JAIL BREAK...6 inmates at this states' largest county jail ESCAPED LAST WEEK
Guess where this was???????
yep you guessed it....where my hinny was bussed last week.....RIGHT ACROSS THE STREET!!!
Throw the damn key away already.

Tuesday, February 14, 2006

My civic duty

I was recently called to report for jury duty. Not asked but told. In our county, it is the one day go (to one of MANY courthouses) if they don't call your number you're done for 1 year or you go, get on a jury(time unknown) you're done for 1 year and then it starts over.

Now, I am all about doing my part to keep America going. I vote, I recycle, I keep up with the politics in my community, I floss, I do my civic duty but there are a few courthouses that I never get called to report to.

Like the one that is 10 minutes away from me... No, I have been called 2 times downtown and 4 times down to the WORST part of town beside the county jail....and we live in a BIGGGGGG county. The first time I drove there (yes sports fans there is NO public transportation to this lovely edifice) I was stunned. Not what I would call a "destination place". And I have had my hinny in a seat EVERYTIME I have been down to this place. I have never been picked and once was escorted out the back door because the judge didn't want me to "influence" the other potential jurors with my opinion(you have read the title to my blog, right?) but never been picked.
So, when I got the notice for jury duty--for downtown--I was thrilled--that it wasn't next to the county jail.
I did debate about whether I could go that day....for all of about 3 secs.....they really frown on you not showing up for jury duty...and I knew I could take public transportation, at lunch go to the BIG department store next door and have lunch, shop and generally have a day off from work that was not so bad. Forget about getting picked....that didn't really cross my mind.

So, I truck off with my bag of books and took the train down and started my day.

Checked in at the court house, got my panel number and prepared to read and do my stuff until it was time to go home. Panel numbers were called in random order....quite a few...I was not worried.. and at 12:05 they called my panel number and my first thought...yeah lunchtime I can go!

Yea right .....down the elevator to the first floor and they loaded 48 of us onto the white county sheriff's bus(with the bars) and took us to the court house by the county jail because...and HERE is a surprise......they didn't have enough people show up to pick a jury.

Ya think???!!

We value our lives, this is NOT a jury of my peers and the day it is you know I am on crack and what planet are you from that people actualy want to drive to the ghetto/ war zone to do their civic duty????
PRoblem solved,,,,,,,,ask' em to come to the nice, clean well located court house downtown and transport their hinny's to the ghetto. .... and then listen the judge tell you what an honor it is to serve on a jury blah blah blah blah. got it in prob.....I will do my civic duty just could I please go to the court house 10 minutes away??
I mean really, those people that live down by the county jail want to come out to the 'burbs almost as much as I want to go by them. Can't we work something else out for this one day and you've served stuff??
So out of 48 potential jurors, 44 of us were questioned(not me which is a SURPRISE), 14 were chosen and they loaded us back on the county sheriff's bus(with the bars) and took us back down to the NICE courthouse.

My only hope was that no one I knew had a camera and snapped my picture as I got on and off the prisoner bus. THAT would have been the I am wrong....the highlight would have been to go back to the ghetto the next day and sit on the jury of the African American kid who had stolen a car(and crashed it) was arrested by police(because he was still IN the car) and sit on the jury to decide if he was gulity or not(the reading between the lines here is that the kids butt was in the seat because THIS is what they could catch him on.)

'Yep that would have been the highlight of that day...translation.....waste of time, mine yours theirs anybodys' Throw his ass in jail and be done with it.

There, my civic duty is discharged for another year.

Sunday, February 12, 2006

Directions -or lack thereof

HUSBAND: What is the address? ( as we are driving downtown)
ME: 3145 N
HUSBAND: are you sure?
ME: yep I wrote it down--- see?(and I pull out the paper and show him)
HUSBAND: ummm dear...that says 3748 I am now going the wrong way
ME: oh...I could've sworn it said 3145...good thing I wrote it down

Friday, February 10, 2006


I love reading blogs..... I try and post to those that I really enjoy and I am on my way to find lots to read.
Love the word BRA(blog reading addict)-I had no idea this was even an acronym!

You have no idea how many good blogs are out there.

If you have stopped by here, nice to see you, leave a message...not necessary to lurk but all are welcome!

Good reading and good blogging!

Saturday, February 04, 2006

Restrooms and teenage girls

There is a phenomenon I've noticed in the restroom.
I know that teenage girls are a breed unto themselves and there are many things I don't understand about the behaviors they do, but having been a teenage girl a LONG time ago, some of their behavior is so strange it borders on the BIZARRE! (to me)
I have been in the stall and heard girls (different ones at different times) discuss everything from their love life -and yes they have a VERY active love life according to the conversations , STDS-who has them who doesn't, BJ's -who gives them, who doesn't, who is good at them, who is not ( my husband says he would love to go back to high school if they are playing spin the boy instead of the bottle and said boy gets a BJ! instead of a kiss), drugs-who does, who doesn't and who SHOULD!!, and the list is endless.
So --the phenomenon I am ALWAYS amazed about is when they then enter the stall to take care of the business that brought them there in the first place, they are unable to do so until someone hits the hand dryer and it kicks on and hides the noise of teeteeing in the potty.!!!! Not only does that surprise and stun me, but that they don't care who is in the stall while these conversations are happening is also shocking!
Many of the things I have heard, even had I done it when I was young, I would have NEVER repeated it to anyone, much less the entire bathroom audience. (To be fair, maybe there were girls in the high school I went to that did that kind of stuff.....but I never knew about it or was so out of the loop that even if they talked about it I wouldn't know what it was they were talking about! For instance, the girl that changed into gym clothes next to me for my entire senior year, was pregnant and when her water broke I thought she had wet her pants......but I don't think she knew she was pregnant either!!!!)
I will be honest and tell you that I have sat in the stall far longer than I needed to so I didn't have to see who these little dumplings were/are that are sharing so much with the public at large. How could I possibly keep a straight face?